The first time I went to a "women’s health clinic" I was 15. I went with my mom. In the waiting room there were just a few other women. All quiet but then the ice broke and the talking began. A well-dressed, well-jewelled woman older than my mom who had a grandchild and could NOT have a baby at this point in her life. A college student who didn’t want to talk about what got her there, she was just happy to BE there. A young mom who had lost her job, gotten a new one but had no insurance and was out of birth control pills. The clinic was going to give her pills to see her through and a free visit with a doctor. A teen girl and what appeared to be her boyfriend came in. The boy whispered something. The girl said no, stay, please. He said loudly – I’ll be in the car. And he was gone.
A few years later, I visited another "women’s clinic". Busier. More multi-cultural. Louder. No men. Some children in tow. The normal hospital waiting room feel – except for the lack of men.
10 years later I visited a Planned Parenthood Clinic for the first time with a friend and her teen daughter. Angry mob outside. My friends daughter angrily said "I bet at least one of those people has a son who doesn’t understand the word "NO". Only one man in the waiting room at this very crowded and clinic. One. Granola and crunchy looking. Birkenstocks when Birkies were only popular in California and Oregon. No woman partner in site. I still sometimes wonder who he was and what he was doing there. That sole man in my experience with "women’s clinics".
I’ve delivered three babies. I’m 43 years old , do you know how many ob- gyn visits that makes? Military hospitals, civilian hospitals (as we military folks call you non-military folks) and the only time I ever saw men in the waiting rooms was for a cancer appointment, a "first appointment" visit in a pregnancy, an ultrasound visit, or a "my wife is ready to get this thing OUT of her, help me!" visit.
This isn’t about men. This isn’t about families. It isn’t about children. It’s about women. It’s about women having control over their lives and their bodies and their choices.
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